We know you’re good at giving, are your able to graciously receive? Can you just say “thank you” when someone gives you a compliment? Or, do you brush the compliment away and feel you’re being modest? Do you accept help when someone offers? Or, do you not want to impose? These are the signs of someone who doesn’t realize that accepting a compliment with a smile and a “thank you” or allowing someone to do a little kindness is being generous. We’re so busy trying not to impose that we cut ourselves off from the broader picture of life. People can see what you’re going through as a Caregiver and will gladly help if they know what they can do.
Today I see a different picture than I used to. It’s nice to allow someone else a chance to feel like they’re helping. And it would be nice to have some help once in a while, too.
Sadly, Caregiving can be so mentally consuming that we have a hard time stepping outside our box. We’re so busy with our “systems” and keeping track of everything that’s going on; notes on everything from conversations with the doctors, to when the last pills were taken, what was eaten at the last meal, to keeping track of weight and blood pressure, etc., that we lose our sense of perspective sometimes. We’re so focused on the serious stuff that we can forget the niceties in life. Maybe we need to draw a big smily face on our notebook page.
I remember becoming aware, after years of pushing the wheelchair in public, that it was mostly women who would offer to open a door for me at the doctors office and elsewhere. At the time, I thought it was because most men had lost the respect for women that they used to have when I was younger. I took notice; a mental notation. But now I think it had something to do with me. I was expecting the men not to offer and that’s what I got. If I was feeling disappointed (or irritated) that an able bodied man just sat there looking at his book or even at me getting through the door by myself, why didn’t I ask him for help? Was I afraid he’d refuse? No. I probably thought I shouldn’t have to ask. Bad vibe. Maybe I was giving the impression that I didn’t want or need any help. It’s possible. We don’t know what we look like sometimes. I think the next time I’m pushing someone in a wheelchair I’m going to smile a lot and ask people to help me with the doors. I have a feeling I’ll get a lot of help and smiles in return. :)
Until soon, I wish you love and smiles.
PS: Many thanks to all of you who comment on my Posts. I love hearing from you.