The holidays are upon us. The craziness is in the air! I’m starting to plan my strategy for grocery shopping till the end of the year, for heaven’s sake. I live a mile from The Grove and Farmer’s Market, one of the most popular tourist sites in Los Angeles, CA. It’s IMPOSSIBLE to get around this city during the holidays. If you’re a busy person like me, one thing you can do is give away some of the tasks you need to get done. This brings to mind one of my husbands favorite adages, DELEGATE!
If you’re a Caregiver, it’s twice as important! During this holiday season, if you’re taking care of a loved one and entertaining, you’ve got to DELEGATE. I remember all too well the reasons for doing everything my way (your way). You want it done right! You don’t want to impose on others. You need control for efficiency, can’t count on others. You want your guests to just enjoy themselves. You have a new set of china and this Is a good time to use it, but you’ll do all the dishes yourself so none will get broken. Do you really look forward to being so exhausted that you have to take aspirin to be able to fall asleep after the big meal?
Caregivers have a tendency to take care of everyone except themselves. People love to know what they can bring to a party that would be most appreciated. Tell them. Allow them to place things on the table, to set up chairs, and give a grandson the task of whipping the cream for pie or let the teenager, who’s bored because her friends aren’t there, be responsible for keeping the gravy stirred and warm. They have to learn sometime.
What if you plan to take really good care of yourself this holiday season? Sit down with pen and paper and write down things that would make you happy. Is there a way to make them happen? Visualize yourself enjoying whatever comes to mind. Then allow the ideas of how to make it happen come into your head. Don’t be afraid to ask someone to participate and help you make that thing become a reality. Just thinking about yourself for a change can bring ideas to mind that will make your life easier.
If you need to be modest with spending money, as is often the case, maybe you could buy some bath bubbles and have some candles ready to light and enjoy while you bathe before bed after everyone is gone and put to sleep. Have a special book ready to read until you dose off for the night. If someone asks what you would like as a gift, maybe a contribution toward a Day Spa would appeal to you.
The idea is to delegate tasks and plan ahead to spoil yourself a little. It will make your life more pleasant and everyone around you happier. You might even find you like it so much you make it a way of life. Always remember that your life is as important as anyone else’s. It’s really not all that important to look perfect in everyone else’s eyes, that’s not going to happen anyway. And thinking you’re in control is a figment of your imagination! I promise you, it feels great to not even want to control things anymore. Trade looking perfect for feeling good. Get your enthusiasm for life back. Be creative!
On the eve of the holidays, I want to say thank you to my wonderful family and friends who have supported my efforts for the last year to make The Caregiving Cornerstone a reality. I’m grateful, also, to all who read my blog and to those who contact me with questions or comments. Please keep the dialog going. We have a lot of Caregivers to reach and help. Thank you, and Happy Thanksgiving to all.
Until soon, I wish you love and a very peaceful holiday season!
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